Wisdom comes at a price. While no one can truly fathom the reason behind every occurrence in life, being able to understand other people’s circumstances well, being able to empathize, knowing their thought process well, and justifying their shortcomings can indeed be a curse.

It is true that they have a take, a perspective, and a valid reason. But so do you! Why does their justification trump yours? And at what point does this insight simply turn you into a sacrificial lamb?

Sacrifice is obviously a healthy and necessary aspect of life–relationships can neither be built without them, nor can they flourish. So long as it is a two-way street. Otherwise it begins to weigh you down. You keep stretching to meet expectations and you keep bending to allow others to accommodate to the growing demands of their lives. You pause yours, make way, support to the best of your abilities. But what happens when it isn’t reciprocated? It makes you question your life choices, of having put your own needs on hold to allow everyone else to grow.

And today they are all growing and have left you far behind. Not behind anyone else–behind your own capabilities, of the expectations and dreams you once had of and for yourself. You molded yourself to fit so many disparate shapes that you are now amorphous– unrecognizable to your eyes.

When you cannot answer the question what would you typically do in a certain situation, know that things have gone too far. You are now incapable of stating your own needs. In actual fact, you do not truly understand your needs anymore. In trying to grasp everyone else’s intentions, yours got burried under the rubble of sacrificing yourself piece by piece.

And then when all else seems to fail, an outburst comes at the “wrong” time. It is an inconvenient time for everyone else. How dare you choose this moment to realize that you exist? How could your needs suddenly matter? The realization dawns upon you that you had once been independent of emotional attachment. Others chose to attach themselves to you with a confining rope, of which they constantly test the tensility at your end, unwillingly pulling you along.

This is when an engulfing calm takes over. You understand that the true nature of every relationship is transient. There is only one true rope that you can hold on to without the fear of falling. The rope that Allah has commanded us to hold onto. The one that will never abandon you, the one that keeps wanting you to hold on tightly. The one that will never ask for sacrifice beyond your potential.

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